When You’re Told To Fit In (And You Know You’re Meant For More)

I watched the new Wicked movie and felt that familiar sting behind my eyes, the kind that sneaks up on me when something hits emotional bone instead of surface-level skin.

Not because of the flying monkeys or the glittering gowns or even the magic.
But because of the pressure those two girls were under long before they ever cast a spell.

Elphaba was told to soften, shrink, and stop causing trouble.
Glinda was told to sparkle on command, never falter, never slip.

One was too much.
One was never enough.

And honestly, every female founder I work with knows exactly what that feels like.

Maybe you do too.

We grow up trying to be “good.”
We learn how to be helpful, polite, agreeable.
Or we learn how to stay small so we don’t overwhelm anyone.

Either path leads to the same place, exhaustion, and a slow erosion of your own voice until it goes fuzzy around the edges.

And this shows up in business in the hardest ways.

You take on client after client because saying no feels dangerous.
You juggle every marketing task because you don’t want to drop the ball.
You try to sound polished because someone once told you that’s “professional.”
You try to be louder because someone else told you that’s what visibility means.

And still…
You feel invisible.

You start to carry the weight of two identities.
Elphaba’s fire.
Glinda’s sparkle.

And you exhaust yourself trying to keep both masks glued in place.

The most heartbreaking thing is how many brilliant women sit across from me on Zoom, women with life-changing expertise, compassion, humor, wisdom, and whisper:

“I feel like a watered-down version of myself.”

They have ideas that could shift entire industries.
Stories that could heal people.
Experiences that could become movements.
But they’ve spent so long performing “what they should be” that they barely remember who they actually are.

And then Wicked drops this reminder right in your lap.

Elphaba didn’t become powerful when she finally learned the right spell.
She became powerful when she stopped apologizing for having power in the first place.

Her green skin wasn’t the problem.
The shame around it was.

That’s what happens in business too.

You tuck away the unconventional parts because you think clients want calm, neutral, safe.
You sand down your genius because you don’t want to intimidate anyone.
You hide the real you, the messy, funny, fiery, grounded, deeply human you, in favor of something smoother and quieter.

But the more you hide, the heavier your business becomes.
The more you try to be Glinda-perfect, the more disconnected you feel.
The more you try to be Elphaba-quiet, the more your brilliance evaporates into thin air.

Because here’s the truth:

The magic in Wicked isn’t the spells or the costumes.
It’s the moment each woman finally stops fitting in and starts becoming.

That’s the moment your brand begins to breathe again too.

Not when you redesign your website.
Not when you finally do that photoshoot.
Not when you find the perfect shade of brand pink.

It starts when you refuse to contort yourself into anyone else’s expectations.
It starts when you claim the room instead of shrinking to fit it.
It starts when you decide that your magic, the imperfect, honest, soulful kind, is the whole point.

If any part of this made you inhale deeply or exhale a little slower, maybe this is your moment too.

Maybe you’re tired of being everyone’s everything.
Maybe you’re tired of being polished when your real life is full of color and chaos and truth.
Maybe you’re tired of the performance.

Maybe you’re ready to be the version of you that has been tapping on your ribcage for years, waiting for permission.

You don’t need a spell.
You don’t need a cauldron.
You don’t even need a wand.

You just need to decide.

Decide you’re done shrinking.
Decide you’re done shining only for others.
Decide that your magic deserves oxygen.

Because it does.
And you do.

So if you’re reading this from the edge of burnout or the middle of confusion or the quiet center where you wonder if you’re ever going to “get it right,” take a breath.

You’re simply on the cusp of becoming.

It’s your turn.
Your turn to grow.
Your turn to be seen.
Your turn to reclaim the magic you thought you had to hide.

And whether you walk this road with me or someone else, I hope you never forget:

You were never meant to fit in.
You were meant to become.

P.S. If you’re the overwhelmed overachiever, the one balancing 42 tabs, a cold coffee, and a never-ending list of “shoulds.” Cut the chaos, keep what works, so you can stop wasting precious time on things that aren’t getting results.